N is for Neville who died of ennui

en‧nui  /É‘nˈwi, ˈɑnwi; Fr. ɑ̃ˈnwi/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation [ahn-wee, ahn-wee; Fr. ahn-nwee]
–noun
a feeling of utter weariness and discontent resulting from satiety or lack of interest; boredom: The endless lecture produced an unbearable ennui.

Excerpt from paper journal, 29th Oct:

“It’s been a while since I was myself. Even now, I can’t claim to be whole again. Sometimes I think that for every piece of me that dies, someone or something else moves in to occupy the space.”

My last couple of weeks felt dead. It’s like I walked out of my own life and couldn’t find my way back. I’ve been doing that a lot this year.

(Entry title from Edward Gorey’s Gashlycrumb Tinies.)