It would seem rather belated, talking about why I started this blog almost a year and a half after the fact. But I assure you that this is purely for opportunistic reasons, namely as an entry to engtech’s first contest for wordpress.com bloggers. I found out about it some weeks ago and had it bookmarked since, waiting for the right time to fill in the 200-word blanks. The time is now…
I started this blog as part of my lifelong campaign to deceive.
That’s right… Deceive. Trickery. Pulling the wool over your eyes.
I knew that at some point of my life, I will achieve enough momentum for people to want to Google my name up. Fro mthe beginning, I was aware of what it meant to put my name on the Internet, unlike a lot of people who still think that their parents/employers/colleagues are net-stupid (until their myspace gets discovered and they get into trouble for those embarrassing photos).
Where was I? Oh yes, trickery.
Instead of gaining my momentum as Famous Writer as I intended, I ended up as a feature writer for a local paper. Working for the newspaper is the only way you can make enough money to pay the bills in this town. Writers are not taken seriously here, not even by their employers.
Most people are dazzled by the job perks, like being able to sample all the new restaurants in town or the fact that I sometimes have to interview people I don’t find very interesting at all… like Akademi Fantasia winners. Oh, the free food! The glamour! They forget that after all the eating, I have to figure out how to word my experience in a manner that will
fool attract you to try the place out, or try to convey how fascinating Jack AF’s celebrity status is.
I get to sound off about the latest movies in the cinema. Wow, do you get to watch all those movies for free? Yep, I do. You’re interested? Sure. I hope you own your own company and can take the middle of a work day off. I can only give you a maximum of three hour notice and we’ll spend at least half an hour of that waiting to see if we actually get to watch the movie.
So at some point, all of you who are enamoured with my exciting life will get a little nosy and want to see if I have a Friendster or myspace page or if I have a blog. Why, gasp! Looks like you found it!
Before you clap your hand with glee and dive in to see what deep dark secrets this writer has spilt online, let me give you a little preface: I wrote every post with the complete conviction that anyone can and will be able to read it, from my boss right down to my classmate from kindergarten, if they ever had the yen to enter my name in Google. I can tell you that realising that little detail deeply affects what I put here.
Of course, there are some truths to make my life sound more convincing. If a few people can verify that Incident X is real and they were there, therefore everything else I blog about must be true too. BWAHAHAHA!!
Do you see now? My blog is part of an elaborately-constructed web of lies!!1 If anyone comes sniffing, they will only find blatant lies and some truths… just like in this post itself.
Have a nice day.